People raising a child alone are as commonplace phenomenon now as a full family. And it will be extremely wrong to assume that they are completely focused on their careers and kids. Very often, people after thirty with a child look great, take care of themselves, wanna some adventure in daily life. They are keenly interested in other people, not just in diapers, powders, school notebooks, and toys.
Despite the child and the presence of life experience, such people also want to see some new things, to build relationships, they want romance and maybe something more serious. There is no need to avoid such people. Here are some tips on how to date people over 30 with a child.
1. No need to think that someone wants to marry from the doorway
This is a very strong and common misconception that should be left in the past a long time ago. Very often, adults with children are completely independent and just want to find new communication outside of their family and work. They want emotion, romantic excitement, delight, and lightness. So try to get rid of the paranoid fear that you will be taken from the threshold to the registry office. You can use information from dating.com to clarify the intentions of your potential mate, but still, do all you can to avoid stereotypes.
2. Make your desires and plans clear
This tip applies not only to people over thirty and with children but in this case, it will be the most relevant thing. Indicate whether you want as clear and soon, as possible. Correctly explain to your mate what do you want - a serious relationship or a short affair for the sake of entertainment. This will make life easier for you and for the person you are interested in.
When you have a child and a career, life is built very distinctly, and you should not break this system. If single childless people appreciate spontaneity and impetuosity in their soul mates, the same people with kids will choose elementary punctuality and commitment.
3. Do not insist on meeting the child
We are talking about a situation where you are not burning with the wish to meet face-to-face with a kid, but for some reason, you believe, that you should because you systematically dating the parent. No, and no again! Between the person who appeared in the child's life simply because it is necessary, and those who, for the sake of general calm, chose to stand aside, the single parent most likely will choose the second one.
4. Do not give any parenting advice
It’s not your business to whom the parent left his child so he spends time with you. He doesn’t need your advice on which school is better, where to go for a vacation or how to feed the kid.
No matter how well-intentioned you are, everything you say will be taken hostile, because the person already has parental experience and knowledge of what to do with his own child. You shouldn’t go into this territory, because even the most gentle and pliant people don’t like to be doubted in their parental authority. Plus, your mate will probably recall such conversations with an ex-spouse, which will not benefit your relationship either.
5. Do not get involved in the child's relationship with the other parent
Very often, the relationship between former spouses is very complicated and confused, and the child doesn’t make this situation easier. It is better to stay away from such issues and let your mate solve them on his own.
Just be gentle and polite, do not violate anyone's private space and you will be just fine.
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